


Surrender

by curlsgetdemgurls



Category: Outlander (TV), Outlander Series - Diana Gabaldon
Genre: M/M, NSFW, commander - Freeform, prisoner
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-04
Updated: 2019-04-04
Packaged: 2020-01-04 19:12:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18349940
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/curlsgetdemgurls/pseuds/curlsgetdemgurls
Summary: Set in Ardsmuir Prison, Lord John Grey asks prisoner Jamie Fraser a very bold question… will Jamie take him up on the offer of comfort?





	Surrender

Jamie had been at Ardsmuir prison for just a few months when Lord John Grey had arrived. He remembered him, after a time — the young boy who had tried to slit his throat years ago during the war. And he knew by the look in his eye, that Lord John certainly remembered him — he was a hard fellow not to remember it seemed. 

Lord John took command of the prison and so that meant that Jamie continued to dine with the man in charge frequently, to keep the peace and ask for things for the men such as blankets or medicines if available. He did what he must for the sake of them. 

They ate and the two men played games of chess as well, and Jamie found it helped keep his mind sharp. It shocked him however, when one night during their games, Lord John asked him about _her._

“Your wife,” John said, looking at Fraser to see how he reacted. “She was a healer?”

“Aye,” Jamie smiled then, just a ghost of it on his lips. “She — Claire,” he gulped audibly, saying her name for the second time in John’s presence. “She had a verra good touch, always healed my wounds and wasna one to shy away from the sight o’ blood like most lasses.” 

Nodding, John crossed his hands over his lap. He had to admit, there was a fair amount of jealousy he felt at the mention of Fraser’s wife. The way that Jamie’s eyes shined, as if he was seeing her before him once again — well, it made his heart clench with pain.

“I remember her,” John said. “She had quite a spirit.” 

“Aye,” Jamie’s eyes softened once again, in memory of her. “A fighter she was.” 

Conversation continued throughout their game and once Jamie had beaten him again, John got bold with the questions. He had been holding back his curiosity for several weeks now, but there was no time like the present to ask what he really wanted to know. 

“If I may ask,” John cleared his throat. “It is a well known fact that the prisoners partake in rather physical,” he coughed slightly, feeling like his collar was tightening, “p-physical activities with one another. Do you partake Mr. Fraser?”

Jamie turned his head sharply to look at John, “Are ye askin’ if I let anyone bugger me?” 

“Yes,” John said. “I only ask because of how you talk about your wife… you must miss her terribly as well as her touch.” 

“I do,” Jamie turned his head now towards the roaring fire. “But the answer to yer question is no. I could never let anyone do that to me.” 

John thought he saw a look of disgust cross Jamie’s face and his stomach twisted in knots. He was foolish to think that Jamie would ever let anyone touch him but his wife. Fraser was a possessive man and he didn’t come across as someone who could easily be taken. 

“Did ye really ask me only because yer curious, Lord John?” Jamie eyed him, one brow raised. John could have lied, he could have said yes, that it was merely a curiosity that he had for all the prisoners, but he didn’t. 

“If I can be quite honest with you,” Jamie nodded for him to continue. “I did wonder about you, just seeing as it had been so long since your wife’s passing… if you had been comforted at all?”

“Comforted?” Jamie’s face twisted in confusion. “Have I laid wi’ a lass since my wife died?” 

John saw that same look of disgust cross Fraser’s face, but it quickly softened and he nodded his head slowly. “Just the once. The night before I was captured by the red coats.” 

The next question John wanted to ask made his heart race and his palms sweat, but he had to ask. “And, if I may be so bold to ask you, would you ever let anyone comfort you again?”

“I dinna see any lasses in the prison, do ye?” Jamie smirked, glancing up at John who was not laughing. 

“I wasn’t talking about… female companionship.” 

Jamie’s mouth opened slightly, a little in shock by Lord John’s bluntness. 

“I know you said you would never let a man…” he raised his brows, “be with you in that way, but there are other ways of receiving and giving pleasure, Mr. Fraser.” 

“What are ye saying Lord John?” Jamie leaned forward, resting his arms on his knees. 

John lost his confidence as he stared back into Fraser’s blue eyes. He wished more than anything that he could just say exactly what he wanted without fear of rejection, but Jamie had made it clear previously that he wouldn’t participate in sexual activities with a man. So John waved his hand, as if brushing off the subject. “Don’t worry about it, just another curiosity of mine.” 

“Ye seem to have a lot of those,” Jamie smirked and then rose. “It’s growin’ late, I should return to my cell.” 

“Ah, y-yes,” John stammered, but didn’t rise to shake the man’s hand and see him out. At the mere thought of laying his hands on the man’s body, John had grown uncomfortably aroused and didn’t want to risk further embarrassment by standing up and revealing himself to Fraser. “You know the way out. I shall see you soon for another round of chess, and I’ll beat you at that one!” 

Jamie smiled slightly, bowed his head and returned to the door where the guards fastened his chains around him, leading him back to the cell. 

“Schiesse!” John cursed, letting his head fall back against the chair and closing his eyes. He was so overwhelmed with need, with want and desire for Fraser that it was affecting his ability to think properly. He didn’t need to do a final walk through the prison before he retired to bed for at least twenty minutes. 

Cursing himself, John pressed his hand over the bulge in his breeks, moaning slightly at the touch. Oh, how he wished it was someone else’s hand, touching him, giving him the relief he so desperately sought. His hand untied the laces of his breeks, and he took a firm hold of his cock, rubbing slowly. John thought of him — the red haired man with broad shoulders and a dark look in his eyes. He felt ashamed, and he tried not to, but it was Jamie’s hand he pictured stroking him, pressing his thumb firmly on the head and spreading his pre-cum around. It didn’t take long and with a muffled groan, John came in long spurts, his eyes shut tight trying to imagine Jamie Fraser’s hand on him. 

++++++

Jamie didn’t see Lord John for the next few days. The prisoners were being sent out each day to mine the roads and bring back rocks to the prison. It was tiresome work and they returned late each night. 

He wasn’t a fool, he knew that Lord John harbored feelings for him — he could see it in the way he looked at him. Jamie also knew what question John had wanted to ask him a few nights ago — would he let him comfort him?

Wrestling with this very question, Jamie had thought of little else in the time spent away from Lord John. Perhaps it was the cold nights and years away from a warm touch that made Jamie not flinch at the idea. Or perhaps it was the loneliness that was eating away at his soul, the need to feel. 

Jamie vowed to never let a man bugger him after he was raped and tortured by Black Jack Randall, and he meant to honor that vow. His body had been beaten, abused and defiled at the mercy of the Captain. He had meant to die — he had never meant to live with the pain and scars he had been left with. 

The men did comfort each other, Jamie could hear them in the middle of the night. They didn’t have loud chains like him — on at all times, but they weren’t quiet about it. Jamie would roll over onto his side, covering his ears with his hands and imagine he was back on the battlefield, with loud explosions to cover up the noises of the men. He felt pity for them, but mostly for himself. And then he felt ashamed whenever the need would come upon him — when the need for Claire was too strong and he awoke with a cockstand after dreaming of her. He would take a firm hold of himself, stroking and cupping his balls as quietly as he could to not shake the chains. It was always Claire he pictured, her wee hands gripping him, and would weep until he came. 

The night after John had asked him how long it had been, Jamie had done just that, only this time he didn’t weep. He still pictured Claire, but it wasn’t sadness that washed over him as he stroked himself to completion. It was a curiosity — something that Lord John had said to him. 

So it was the question Jamie thought of when he returned to Lord John’s chambers a few nights later for another game of chess — would he let someone comfort him?

It didn’t take long to beat John at chess, Jamie was quite good at it and he wasn’t about to throw the game and let the man win just because of his position. 

“Another game?” John asked as he poured them both another glass of sherry. 

“Perhaps a bit later,” Jamie cleared his throat, feeling heat rise to his cheeks. It was now or never. “John, I wanted to ask ye a question… about the other night?”

“Go ahead,” John smiled, handing him the refilled glass. 

“Ye asked me,” Jamie’s cheeks flushed and he had to turn his face away, “if I would ever let anyone comfort me. And that there were… other ways…” 

“Besides the buggering,” John finished, a nervous smile playing on his lips. “That’s what you called it, correct?”

“Aye,” Jamie nodded. “I ask because I think… I think I might.” 

John’s mouth fell open, and he promptly shut it, taking a deep breath. Never in his wildest dreams — well, perhaps in his wildest, had John thought that Fraser would be saying what he was now. 

“Your wife, did she touch you? In other ways besides the obvious?” 

“Of course,” Jamie blushed. 

“Then that is all I mention, that kind of touch,” John placed his glass down on the table. “You must know that I — I would never force anything upon you, James.” 

“Aye, I ken that, John,” Jamie smiled and it eased John’s nerves immensely. “I do trust ye.” 

“That’s very good,” John smiled and felt his stomach tighten. “I must ask you again, however, so that we are clear. You do want me to touch you, sexually that is?”

Jamie’s hands gripped his knees, knuckles going white. It took everything in him not to storm out of the room and forget this ever happened. He felt ashamed that he had come to this — this kind of pleasure he was seeking out from another, let alone another man. If he continued, he was already commending his soul to God. 

“Aye, I do,” he looked up, meeting John’s intense stare. “And, I ken that if ye would like me to repay ye, I will. But I will no’ bugger ye, John.” 

“I would never expect you too, Jamie — I can call you Jamie?” 

He nodded, bending his head to stare at the ground. Jamie thought he would die in this prison, chained for life, never to see his family again. He had already lied, stolen and killed — what was another sin on the list?

“I don’t really know what to do next,” Jamie cleared his throat. “Usually, I would be in bed wi’ my wife or at least covered wi’ a plaid.” 

“You can remain where you’re sitting if you like,” John said. “I can come to you.” 

With Jamie’s permission once again, John then rose and crossed the few steps towards him, bending down to both his knees before the large Scot who was not meeting his eye. “You can tell me to stop at any moment, Jamie. I will not do anything you do not want.” 

“I ken,” Jamie nodded his head and then let John push his legs further apart and he settled in between them. He rid his mind of all thoughts of Claire, she would have no part in this. As John moved his hand towards Jamie’s laces, his body tensed. 

“It’s alright, Jamie,” John laid his other hand on his knee. “This is meant to feel good.” 

Taking a deep breath, Jamie laid his head back on the chair, looking down through thick lashes at the other man’s slender hand on his crotch. Already, from that simple touch of his laces being pulled loose, he was becoming hard. It had been so long since another had touched him like this. 

John went slowly, pulling the laces free and then he pushed Jamie’s shirt up a bit. Fraser’s pubic hair was a dark golden color and John trailed his finger from the man’s navel to the patch of hair. Jamie squirmed, his legs trying to close. “Is this alright?”

“Aye, keep goin’,” Jamie nodded. “I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t be sorry, Jamie. It’s normal for you to feel this way, to feel like you’re betraying someone,” John thought of Hector, his first love those many years ago. “This is only for your comfort, for your pleasure. I want to give that to you, if you’ll let me.” 

Jamie did trust the man, a red coat he was, but he had been a good friend to him here in the prison. As far as a prisoner and a commander could become friends at least. He reached out his hand and cupped the man’s cheek, pressing his thumb firmly on his bottom lip. It was odd to be in such a predicament and not be staring into the eyes of his wife. But Claire was gone. She was never coming back to him. 

“I will,” Jamie smiled softly, feeling himself relax. He unclenched his thighs and settled his hands on the armrest. John moved his hand back to Jamie’s pubic hair, running his fingers through it before opening his breeks to reveal more of him. 

John wasn’t entirely shocked to see just how large Jamie was. His cock jutted out the moment he pulled back the thin material, one long vein throbbing. John’s mouth watered and his own length hardened at the sight. 

“Impressed are ye?” Jamie smirked, feeling only a little proud. 

“You are a rather large man,” John looked up at him, “It would be only fitting that the size would match your stature.” 

Feeling quite aroused, John then glanced back down at the heavy cock before him. He ran one finger down the shaft and heard a sigh from above. Jamie’s eyes were closed, his hands gripping the chair. John then pressed the pad of his thumb against the tip of Jamie’s cock, collecting the pre-cum. He couldn’t decide where to look — up at Jamie’s face, twisted in pleasure and almost confusion, or down at his cock, growing harder in his hand. 

“This won’t take long,” John said quietly and then wrapped his hand firmly around the man’s cock. A muffled moan left Jamie’s parted lips at the other man’s touch. He parted his eyes slightly to look down at him. It was rather erotic to see him, bent on his knees before him, holding his cock firmly in his hand. 

As John leaned forward and swiped his tongue across the exposed head, Jamie couldn’t help but let out a loud groan and John’s other hand came up quickly to cover his mouth. 

“We mustn’t be heard,” John slowed the rhythm of his hand and Jamie nodded and John removed his hand from his mouth. A mischievous glint shined in the man’s eyes, however as he bent his head all while looking up at Jamie and placed his tongue flat on his cock. 

Jamie’s hips bucked on their own accord and he knew he was fast approaching his peak. A firm downward stroke, a lick, a light squeeze followed by John sucking on the tip of his cock had Jamie spilling his seed into the man’s hand, his eyes fluttering shut. 

“Jesus, Mary and Joseph,” Jamie sighed as he opened his eyes and looked down at the mess he had made. John was wiping his hand and coat with a nearby cloth they had used for dinner. “Oh Christ! John, I’m sae sorry, I didna mean t—“ 

“It’s perfect alright, Jamie,” John assured him. “I’m glad for it.” 

Jamie didn’t know quite what to do, but as John then rose and walked back to his chair, he tucked himself back into his breeks, lacing them up quickly. He glanced over at John and could see the man’s arousal clear as day, it was an odd feeling knowing that he was the cause of that. 

“Do ye want me to…” Jamie nodded at John’s trousers.

“Oh!” John looked down and then placed his hands over himself. “I don’t want you to do anything your uncomfortable with too soon, Jamie.” 

“Ah,” Jamie said. 

“But, perhaps,” John gulped. “The next time?”

“If ye like,” Jamie said quietly, already feeling nervous and yet excited at the idea. 

They were both silent for a few minutes. Both contemplating what had just transpired between them. John had never imagined this would happen and Jamie certainly never thought he would allow it. 

Not knowing what else to say, Jamie rose from his chair and this time John stood too and followed him to the door. “You’ll return tomorrow evening, Fraser?”

“Aye, tomorrow,” Jamie nodded and then the door was opened and his chains returned. 

++++++

The hours of the day were far too long. They seemed to taunt John, ticking by at a snails’ pace, knowing that John craved the dark of night that the setting of the sun brought. He didn’t expect anything in return, it had simply been enough to give the Scot pleasure and to see that sweet look upon his face at the end. He wondered what he thought about — probably his wife. 

As he tended to his duties around the prison, he could still taste the man on his lips. Salty and slick — the curve of him on his tongue and the warmth of his cock. Not for the first time, John felt envy rise up in him at the thought of Claire Fraser. The idea that she had lain with Jamie hundreds of times, felt his body against hers and tasted him just as he had — it drove him mad. 

He knew that John was nothing but a hand to take pleasure from and perhaps even a friend to Jamie — he would never be what Claire was to him. John didn’t want to be, well… maybe he did, but he wouldn’t even try. 

It was enough to think of their experience the night before for the rest of his life and what he hoped would be returned to him tonight. 

So it was with jittery knee that John awaited in his chambers for Jamie, his leg bouncing and his face flushed. If he had it his way, he would throw Jamie against the wall and press his mouth to the man’s the moment he stepped through the door, but he wasn’t a brute. 

A soft cough interrupted his thoughts and he turned to see the Jamie and the guard behind him, now shutting the door to leave them alone. 

“Fraser,” John smiled and rose. Without thinking, he wrapped his hands around the large Scot and embraced him. Jamie’s hands only lightly touched him, mostly likely still testing their new found territory of closeness. “S-sorry.”

“Dinna fash,” Jamie smiled and then took his normal seat opposite John. They were both nervous, having set an expectation for the night. If Jamie was honest with himself, he was curious and had lain awake the previous night, wondering. 

“Shall we eat first?” John offered, gesturing to the table before them. 

They conversed as normal, John doing most of the talking as Jamie didn’t have a lot of things to inform John of that he didn’t already know — at least, that he wanted him to know. At the end of their meal, as John laid down his knife and fork, he wiped his mouth with the cloth, his gaze moving towards Jamie. 

“I havena forgotten,” Jamie said. “In case ye were wonderin’ if I had.” 

John shook his head, “No, no. I didn’t think that, well I just…” his voice trailed off. 

“I want to do it John, repay ye for yer kindness ye showed me,” Jamie swallowed. “That is if ye still want me to?”

“God yes!” John said a bit too enthusiastically and then Jamie laughed, the first real laugh John had heard from the man. “I do, yes,” he said a bit more subdued. 

Without further small talk, Jamie rose from the chair and this time it was him that knelt before John, placing his large hands on the man’s knees. “I’ve never done this before.” 

John placed his hand under Jamie’s chin, turning his face to look up at him. “It’s not all too different from when you touch yourself, it’s the same motions.” 

“I think I’ll start how ye did, maybe?” Jamie questioned, moving his hand towards the man’s bulge and resting it lightly over it. John’s cock twitched at the touch and if John hadn’t had more self control, he could have come just from that. 

No words were able to leave his mouth, so John simply nodded for Fraser to continue. Jamie’s hand trembled slightly as he palmed his cock, feeling John’s length harden under his touch. It was almost a powerful sensation. 

Next, he moved his hand to his trousers, untying the laces and pulling them loose. His pubic hair was dark, like the hair on top of his head and Jamie ran his fingers through it, just as he might have on Claire. Then as he pushed the trousers down, it was quite the opposite of Claire he found. 

John’s cock was thick, much like his only a bit smaller in length, but decent nonetheless as far as cock’s go. It sprang free from its constraints, pressing against the man’s stomach. 

“I think I will not last long with you looking at me like that,” John stuttered. 

Jamie only smirked and then took a deep breath, finally gripping the throbbing cock in his hand. It was warm and somewhat slick with sweat and Jamie began to move his hand back and forth, much like he would touch himself. He looked up at John’s face to see if he was doing it right and saw a single tear falling down his cheek. He took that as a good sign and then increased the pressure. 

A slight twist of his wrist, a firm squeeze at the base that Jamie knew he himself liked had the man moaning. He was still curious, however and so he bent his head, placing his tongue on the tip of John’s cock. 

John’s eyes flew open and he cursed in German as he watched Fraser take more of him in his mouth. It was only the tip and a bit more that Jamie ventured to take, but it was more than enough. He swirled his skilled tongue around several times, before then pulling out and placing his thumb over the head. John placed his hand on Jamie’s shoulder, watching the man’s hand continue to stroke him. He lost himself in his touch, saying Jamie’s name softly as he came and Jamie squeezed every last drop. 

“Ye make nice sounds,” Jamie said as he offered him a cloth to clean up. “Not the kind of sounds I would have thought a man would make, mind ye.” 

“I take that as a compliment, Jamie,” John smiled, at once feeling more open with the Scot. 

Once he had tidied up and arranged himself back to a normal state, John reached out a hand, cupping Jamie’s cheek. “I hope you know that I do not expect you to do this again. That is… unless you want to.” 

“I’m no sure,” Jamie said. “I did like it,” he smiled. “But I dinna ken how to feel about it just yet.” 

“Will you let me know when you do?” 

“Aye,” Jamie said and then stood up, pulling John to his feet. “There is one thing I do want to do before I leave tonight though.” 

“What is that?” John said, his heart speeding up as he stood very close to Jamie. 

Without another word, Jamie placed both his hands on John’s face and kissed him. Not a hungry, passion filled kiss that John craved from the man, but a simple sweet kiss. John placed his hands on Jamie’s forearms, not wanting the kiss to end. He dared press his tongue forward and with relief, Jamie let him part his lips. 

They kissed for some time, the only sound in the room of the fire and the wetness of their lips. As John started to pull away for air, he felt Jamie’s arousal pressing against him. There was nothing that needed to be said as John looked into Jamie’s eyes. With a nod, John slipped his hand into Fraser’s trousers, taking firm hold of him. 

John gasped as he felt Jamie’s hand slide into his trousers, gripping his cock. The men untied their laces for more movement and then kept up a steady pace, getting each other off. Their breaths quickened and moans died on their lips as both heads turned down and watched as a flurry of hands stroked hard cocks. 

“Christ!” Jamie grunted and his torso shook slightly as he spilled himself into John’s hand, followed shortly by John, his own body shaking. 

They cleaned up for the second time that night, both now sated. The air was filled with a tension, but not an unpleasant one. 

“Until next time?” John said to Jamie near the door. 

“Aye, I’ll see ye soon then, Lord John,” he bowed his head and returned back to the darkness of the prison halls. 

John dreamt of Jamie that night and would for many nights to come. He woke every morning and reminded himself that what had occurred hadn’t been one of those dreams. And Jamie wrestled with his own feelings on the matter for a very long time. Claire was his wife — in this century or not, and he loved her. John was a friend, and he had surrendered his body to the man, seeking comfort when he couldn’t find it in the one he truly wanted it with. 

“Keep her safe,” Jamie prayed each night. “Her and the child… and may God have mercy on my soul,” he added from now on, remembering his time with Lord John Grey. 


End file.
